Posts Tagged ‘painful puns’

Double Puntendre

February 13, 2009

Yes, of late I have been paying Friday homage to Mrs. B. and her slumbering “Column Inch“.

No, I will NOT count this as an homage.  Mostly because I suspect that it won’t be received well.  But it’s mine.  And I had fun coming up with it.  And, therefore, wanted to share.

But, consider yourself forewarned.  If you do not like random grammarama or poor punnage, stop reading now.

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“Hello, transom!”, Constance faux pas’d nervously as Nick dropped through the skylight.  She had not defenestrated in over a month and suspected herself expectant.

Nick pondered the mullioned possible reasons for the gravid demeanor of Constance.  Staring Constance in the eyes, the windows of the soul, he guessed his first inclination true.  “Gestate the obvious,” Nick hissed.

“It panes me,” whispered Constance, “to tell you your dormer mate (who was delightfully double hung) recently palladian with my heart and body…. and I now find myself fecund to none.”

Nick, had every right to show his jalousie, but could not picture himself without her.  He surprisingly said, “Awning to the fact you are my wife, I forgive you.”