Okay, we’ll get this part out of the way early so you can save your comments for something more pithy – – I’m old.
Meaning, I have trouble remembering things. No, not to the point of Alzheimer’s or dementia (though for the latter, I’ve had people suggest that I’ve lived with that my whole life long).
yeah, you first
I like going to a local pub for drinks, eats, and socialization. I go so often that I’ve gotten to know many of the wait staff. Well, again, when I say “know”, I mean “recognize”. But, I still like to call them by name, so need a little help.
Enter the iPhone with its nifty Notes function. I’ve been keeping track of the names as I meet the new folks and to remember the ones who’ve been there awhile. The iPhone, though, has limited space, so I have to have a shorthand of sorts. Using physical features, resemblances, or the like to try and capture a name to a person.
Here’s the list I have.
You have two challenges (other than the challenge of trying to figure out just what the fuck I’m talking about and laughing in the first place) – –
1) One of these is an utter fake, put in by a drunken cohort. Which one?
2) One of these was eagerly written by a committee of three women in my group. Which one?
=-=-=-=-=-=-=
Pub Awesome Staff Kidz
Alice-tall blonde yum
Monica-curly brunette yum, oh-that-smile
Rebecca-sassy blonde, w/Rocky
Rocky-dark hair barkeep
Ted-long, flippy hair
Matt-glasses, extra appetizers
Dalton-skinny, vandyke
Bob-homer simpson
Joe-Rocky looking guy, close cut beard
Becky-York girl, legs too thin
Beth-always a necklace, nice cleavage, brunette
Casey-the manager
Helga-big ass and rack. Dirty, dirty girl
Jessie-BLONDE, cute face, skinny legs
Christine-big rack
Sarah-shag red hair, good tips gets a great hug
Andrew-london. wicked smile. fab bum
Jenna-12 year old brunette
Betty-Monica’s friend
Terri-glasses wearing hottie who winked at dear friend
Jed-scrubby beard
Kaylie-looks like cousin judith
=-=-=-=-=-=
Tags: drinking as a hobby, fun with brain cells, lists of lists, Pub
The Wilds of Ohio 
August 13, 2011 at 00:22 |
Helga wants me. She just doesn’t know it yet…
August 18, 2011 at 12:58 |
actually, she was asking about you just the other night. there’s interest there!
August 13, 2011 at 09:23 |
1. Helga-big ass and rack. Dirty, dirty girl
2. Andrew-london. wicked smile. fab bum
ok, so how close was i, sugar? 😉 xoxoxoxo
August 18, 2011 at 13:01 |
you were so close you hit the bullseye, darlin’. gladni didn’t offer up my car as a prize.
August 13, 2011 at 10:33 |
I think savannah’s got it right.
1) I can’t believe anyone in Ohio would be named Helga and also be a dirty, dirty girl.
2) AFAIK, gnukid, you wouldn’t be admiring the rear end of anyone named “Andrew”.
Why the list? Don’t they have name tags? No? Huh.
August 18, 2011 at 13:05 |
you’d be surprised at the number of ‘wholesome midwest girls’ who are also dirty-dirty girls. as to andrew, i let the girls have their moment. i’ve no cle if it was fab or not.
August 14, 2011 at 07:43 |
This is cracking me up, but I must admit I found the reference to the 12 year old somewhat disturbing. So not sure if that is accidental, merely factual, or 1 or 2. I though the Andrew reference was number 1, but is too coherent for a drunk person. So yeah, Helga for number 1.
Also, I think you should obliterate the list if they don’t know your name.
August 18, 2011 at 13:18 |
the ’12-year-old’ reference was for recognition only. not some Lolita reference. ew.
actually, they both (andrew and helga) were written by partially inebriated women.
some know my name. some don’t, but pretend (and do know my drink of choice).
August 15, 2011 at 02:59 |
1. Helga
2. Andrew
August 18, 2011 at 13:22 |
another winner! i’m going to have to come up with a tougher contest. but, then again, i think you know the author of both!
August 18, 2011 at 08:40 |
I rolled the dice and got “Becky-York girl, legs too thin”
That can’t be right.
August 18, 2011 at 13:25 |
nope. you need a new set of dice.