Feigned Interest

I work with lots of folks in my division who have significantly less than stellar social skills.  I won’t name profession names, as they actually run the gamut of program manager, financial manager, engineer, logistician, and more.

I had the pleasure was forced by my boss into talking with one of these folks today.  They had no clue that the world does not revolve around their profession.  They blithered on as if I really cared  what they were saying and they actually found humor in the driest, most mundane statements.

Specialist: “…and then the RQ713 lasted only 20 hours instead of the 30 in the manual…[giggle, snort, choke]…”

How long could I keep my eyes open?  More importantly, how long can I keep an appearance of feigned interest?  If I fell asleep, how long until I got whiplash from the neck bob?

Or, worse, someday I’m going to get caught as I let loose with a raucous snore.

I need a new job…but I’m guessing there are people like that in every corner of business.

…or I need to win the lottery…but that would actually require buying a ticket.

…or, even better?  I’m taking applications for a ‘Sugar Mama’.

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6 Responses to “Feigned Interest”

  1. daisyfae Says:

    stiff collar, hunk of rebar running up the back and into a festive hat. might hold your head up. with such shitty social skills, these types may not even notice if your eyes close…

  2. silverstar98121 Says:

    Boy do I know that feeling. Good luck with the lottery or a sugar mama. I think they are at least as likely as winning the lottery without buying a ticket.

  3. Sally Says:

    laughing picturing you in a festive hat…

  4. nursemyra Says:

    use stage makeup to paint open sores on your face and do a lot of coughing

  5. beaverboosh Says:

    raise a leg and let out an enormous amount of wind, keeping a very straight face, as if nothing had occured

  6. thegnukid Says:

    daisyfae – at least you have the rebar running up my back and not up my ass. and, yeah, they. are. clueless.

    silverstar – oh, wah…no sugar mama? damn. so what would be the next most likely i could find? – – aspertame mama?

    sally – brings back fond memories, huh? now, the check is on its way, so please keep those photos locked away, ‘kay?

    nursemyra – yes! a winner. although, as daisyfae said, they’d likely not notice. but i’d have a good time doing that nonetheless

    beaverboosh – and this would be different from what i usually do how? [chortle]

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