Yes, of late I have been paying Friday homage to Mrs. B. and her slumbering “Column Inch“.
No, I will NOT count this as an homage. Mostly because I suspect that it won’t be received well. But it’s mine. And I had fun coming up with it. And, therefore, wanted to share.
But, consider yourself forewarned. If you do not like random grammarama or poor punnage, stop reading now.
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“Hello, transom!”, Constance faux pas’d nervously as Nick dropped through the skylight. She had not defenestrated in over a month and suspected herself expectant.
Nick pondered the mullioned possible reasons for the gravid demeanor of Constance. Staring Constance in the eyes, the windows of the soul, he guessed his first inclination true. “Gestate the obvious,” Nick hissed.
“It panes me,” whispered Constance, “to tell you your dormer mate (who was delightfully double hung) recently palladian with my heart and body…. and I now find myself fecund to none.”
Nick, had every right to show his jalousie, but could not picture himself without her. He surprisingly said, “Awning to the fact you are my wife, I forgive you.”
Tags: big words, painful puns, pregnant windows, random thoughts, REALLY painful puns, too much codeine in my diet?, writing, writing absurdly
The Wilds of Ohio 
February 13, 2009 at 10:09 |
An electrician comes home at 3:00 a.m. smelling of alcohol. His wife says, “Wire ya insulate?” He answers, “Watts it to ya, I’m ohm, ain’t I?”
February 13, 2009 at 12:57 |
“fecund to none” – that’s pretty good Gnukid
February 13, 2009 at 13:12 |
*groan* @ TUB *hee hee*
A good way to end the week Gnu. I think Mrs B may have serious competition 😉
February 13, 2009 at 20:47 |
you heard about the couple who mixed up their window putty with their sex lube? their windows fell out.
sorry. that’s all i got. i’m going back to sleep now…
February 14, 2009 at 09:29 |
@daisyfae: even worse is mistaking your tube of KY for toothpaste in the dark …
February 14, 2009 at 11:29 |
t.u.b. – *snort*! good one… i likes it.
nursemyra – i was pretty pleased with that one myself. it started out as a post only about ‘window’ puns… but when that popped up? i had to add the preganancy angle as well.
Miss P – ahh, go on. no…seriously… go on! more! ;->
daisyfae – i didn’t see THAT one coming… [chortle]… good one, too!
Miss P – whoa… the images and thoughts flashing through my brain right now? yow! i need to go lie down…
February 14, 2009 at 12:04 |
So did I dear, so did I