How does it go? “When life gives you lemons, make lemonade”… right?
So I barely missed hitting the car ahead of me at lunchtime. Turning left out of my parking lot, you have to wait to slide into the oncoming traffic. The car in front of me did just that, waiting until an opening in the traffic to pull out. Seeing him start out, I glanced left and right to see if I could follow quickly and hit the gas… only to see the guy in front of me had decided his car didn’t have enough guts to merge. He had hit the brakes… and I had to do the same to avoid hitting him, coming mere millimeters from his rear bumper.
Whew!! An accident averted. It was going to be a good day…
…then I started home at the end of the work day…and the karma gods started chortling and rubbing their hands together…
There’s always a long line at the traffic light leaving my business complex. I usually have to wait two or three cycles before I can leave. Traffic was stop-and-go. I just finished moving up behind the car in front of me and stopped. Relaxing, because I can’t make the light change any faster, I glanced in my rearview mirror.
Uh-oh…
Apparently the guy behind me didn’t move up right away, saw a big opening in traffic, and darted forward.
And forgot to stop. POW!! Right into the back of my car. My car lurched forward and hit the guy in front of me.
Luckily, no one was hurt badly. Since I saw the guy coming fast in my rearview mirror, I did what you’re not supposed to do–I tensed up. I have a nifty sore shoulder/neck which, after sleeping tonight, I bet is going to hurt like anything tomorrow. I’ll be stiff, but not in a good way.
Minor damage to the car in front of me… actually just some scrapes from my license plate bolt.
Not too much to mine, either. The back bumper is a little wobbly (much like I was after getting stunned by the collision).
The guy who hit me? No clue why he took the brunt of it, but he blew out his radiator, smashed his front bumper, and broke a light… good! Charitable feelings for others? Right. Glad his car got nailed. (Okay, yeah, glad he wasn’t hurt… i’m not that much of a twit).
So, looks like I’ll be going to the insurance adjuster, the body shop, and, hopefully not, the doc.
Yep, when life gives you lemons, make lemonade.
But, trust me on this, when life gives you a bowl of shit, don’t try to make anything…. just leave it sitting there.
Tags: bumper cars, Cars, life, sore neck, stupid sayings
The Wilds of Ohio 
September 24, 2008 at 23:04 |
Hmmm…I could have sworn that the saying was: “When life hands you lemons, make a double Ketel One martini (shaken-not stirred) with a twist”.
Is that not it?
Anyhoozie, I’m so sorry about your fender bender. Those suck. About 2-3 months ago, I was hit in the rear (are you chuckling?) by a massive Tahoe. My sweet little car was totaled. Sad.
Luckily, I wasn’t hurt…neither was the driver of the tank. Hopefully you won’t be either. Whiplash is no fun!
September 25, 2008 at 00:07 |
Let’s finish the thought – “When life gives you a bowl of shit…” Make Shit-a-ritas! Fill a blender with ice, a bowl of shit, and some nice fruity garnish… Mmmm-mmm GOOD!
September 25, 2008 at 01:39 |
Here’s hoping that the guy who hit you has insurance, you don’t have whiplash, and that the repairs are simple. I hate it when things like this happen. But I also see the karma gods at work here. Next time, don’t be in such a hurry.
September 25, 2008 at 01:51 |
Everytime I get hit it costs me. The last time was almost a thousand dollars. I almost had a big truck give me a colon exam on my way home tonight when traffic backed up on the freeway. As Maxwell Smart would say, “Missed me by that much!”
I hope you are pain free by the time you read this.
September 25, 2008 at 06:54 |
Yeah, the one we go with is…when life hands you lemons, get out the tequila.
But ja. I’d slink away from the shit bowl and hibernate in bed for a week.
September 25, 2008 at 08:13 |
oh, that explains why when I say “When life gives you lemons, squirt the juice into the eye of your enemy”, I get a baroo.
September 25, 2008 at 08:38 |
Ugh. Car accidents are my kryptonite. I fear them, unreasonably so, every time I get behind the wheel. Not needing a car is primarily what kept me in New York City for so long. Well, glad you’re not broken.
September 25, 2008 at 15:23 |
Dolce: I’m with you on the tequila, sista!
September 25, 2008 at 22:50 |
leavingevangeline – you started a trend here… seems a lot of folks think drinking is the right solution. and who am i to deny that. i’m with you. Ketel martinis on me!
daisyfae – you almost had me convinced… until you got to the fruity garnish… much too froo-froo for me. i’ll take my shitinis straight, thank you.
silverstar – actually, fate had it that the guy who hit me was insured by the same insurance company as i am. should make it easier… and, yes m’am, i’ll slow down [shuffling feet]
donstuff – almost had a big truck give me a colon exam… laughing my ass off at that one. i’m still achy in the shoulder, but doing much better, thanks.
dolce – yep, i’ll slink away… but i’m taking the damn tequila and lemons with me. oo, and the salt…
stephanie – laughin’… no ‘baroo’ from me. i like that one better. you’re a feisty girl and that proves it.
t.u.b. – i understand your fear, superman. i’m still waiting on some brilliant engineer to invent the teleporter.
parenthesis – you bring the lemons or limes and we can make it a party
September 25, 2008 at 23:00 |
Makes me glad I live in the country. I see no more than a half dozen vehicles on my five mile commute to work. My biggest hazard is a traffic signal to cross a highway into my plant site. I just wait until the vehicles coming both ways stop before I proceed, since I’ve seen way more than one tandem gravel hauler blow that red.
Hopefully the whiplash is light and short lived.