The Etiquette of Lurking

I’ve come to realize that the customs of the ‘net are as varied as the customs around the world. What’s expected on one blog site is considered merely okay on another and gasp-worthy-forbidden on yet another.

So my problem is understanding which is which and when is where and why and so forth (got that? good…). Thus the practice of lurking, which in itself seems sort of wrong–kind of like a peeping tom checking out the prom queen’s bedroom window after her shower …not …that …I …uhhh …would know …ummm …anyway ….

So, I lurk at blogs to see what is said and how it is said. And I’m still lost, as a blog newbie, on how to join in. I almost feel like I’m imposing on a family gathering…or the nerdy kid trying to break into that group of the cool kids.

I welcome input from my fellow Range Riders on advice for easing into feeling welcome at your sites. Yep, I’ve jumped in some places already — one I was invited to, the others referenced off of that. But it still doesn’t feel comfortable. I know there are really no “rules”. But it would be nice to have an idea how to go. Ahhh, perhaps practice makes perfect and all.


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14 Responses to “The Etiquette of Lurking”

  1. daisyfae Says:

    Know the feeling… i felt like a stalker when i started reading blogs of people i didn’t actually “know” in person. when i finally came out of lurker status, it seemed weird… in general, be polite (which you always are), be brief (at least at first) and see how you are “welcomed”. Face it – when we decide to hit the “publish” button, we put it out there to be read! Seems to me that most people welcome readers warmly!

  2. azahar Says:

    Trust me, people LOVE IT when someone new shows up and shows an interest in their blog.

    I know I did. 🙂

  3. thegnukid Says:

    daisyfae – Thanks, it’s good to know my ‘seemed weird’ is shared. I do feel like I’ve given the giant boulder a push down the hill…no stopping it now!

    azahar – And thank you, too for making me feel quite welcome.

  4. kyknoord Says:

    I know what you mean. It’s a bit like showing up at a cocktail party where you only recognise a few people. Nonetheless, it’s always good to see a new – uh – face.

  5. Rob Says:

    Hey. Cute moniker too, by the way. Welcome to the blogosphere where we have the opportunity to “meet” folks that in days of yore would never have come to pass.

    Initially I found interesting blogs using “Next Blog” on blogger or through a Firefox add-in called “Stumble!” Then it was a matter of checking the links on blogrolls or, moreso, the links of those actively commenting. (Which is how I got here from gimcrack hospital.)

    Anyway, yeah it seems weird at first, but after awhile the weirdness fades away and as long as blogs and the comments they inspire are entertaining or otherwise stimulating I’ll keep reading and adding my two cents.

    I figure if I cross a line, someone will tell me to FOAD, but it hasn’t happened yet.


    P.S. I echo what azahar said above.

  6. silverstar98121 Says:

    As a fellow newbie, I know it seems strange to be lurking at other people’s blogs. But you learn a lot, and maybe make new friends. I appreciated that you dropped by my place and left a comment. You are welcome to lurk at my place anytime.

  7. azahar Says:

    Well yeah, because the worst thing is showing up at a cocktail party and recognising EVERYBODY … like, how boring is that!

    Anyhow, you gotta start somewhere. May I say that you have so far shown quite exquisite taste in the blogs you have been partaking of!

  8. Kym Says:

    Most bloggers I know LOVE comments. I’ve only been blogging since October and have been lucky enough to have met lots of interesting writers/photographers. Never once have I been made to feel unwelcome after I commented.

  9. thegnukid Says:

    kyknoord – A big welcome to you. Did you mean “…gnu – uh – face”?

    rob – Yeah, I agree with you…it’s that FOAD bomb I don’t want though. But, we put ourselves out here, so we need to be big kids about it.

    silver – Welcome to you as well. Thanks for permission to lurk. But I’m thinking I’ll be a bit more active commenting.

    azahar – Yep, only the best of sites get my attention.

    Kym – And a welcome to you, too. I’ve been getting such great comments, such as yours, I’m not feeling quite so much the outsider. Still a bit, but getting there…

  10. nursemyra Says:

    azahar said it for me in her first comment. we LOVE it when someone new drops by and leaves a line or two 🙂

  11. thegnukid Says:

    nm – so very happy to see you here on the Range. Please come visit often…and be assured I will be doing the same.

  12. dolceii Says:

    Ja. Pretty much just be yourself…you’ll find the blogs that you hook into, and you’ll avoid the ones that gasp too much (unless its fun)…and most of us are such comment whores…ahem….ja, ok, me….that new lurker/commenters are loved and adored!

  13. anniegirl1138 Says:

    I just jump in and comment when the mood hits. Often I find that the blogger will respond as well as other commenters, There are some instances though that I am ignored no matter how often I read and/or comment. The way I see it, if you want a private club then you have your blog password only. If it’s open for all to read than it’s open for all comments too.

  14. Travel Games « The Wilds of Ohio Says:

    […] of that, i engaged in a favored airport practice.  Too shy to chat up a stranger, I revert to ‘lurking’ of a different sort and just people […]

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